Recently, I find myself realizing more and more that life in the 21st century more or less sucks. I’m not the only person who thinks/feels this way, judging by the magazine articles and blog posts I’ve read, conversations I’ve had and overheard, and my own experience. I think I'll take some time to enumerate my own reasons why I think this is; seeing as how this is (partially) my blog and all (or at least what passes for a blog these days):
After 25, all your friendships go downhillThis, my friends, is a sad fact of life. Twenty-five is that age where people begin to get into ‘real’ adult relationships. These things are to friendships as silver bullets are to werewolves. Especially if the friends we’re talking about are women.
One thing I’ve noticed is that for most people, once they enter that long term relationship, they let their other relationships fade. People often do this under the false assumption that friendships, once they reach a certain point, no longer require attention and/or nurturing.
You know, I’m stereotyping. Its not just women who do this; Lord knows I haven’t seen any of my boys in more than 6 months. And yes, they’re all wife’d up before you even ask. One’s even engaged (Congrats, boy!).
The worst part I, as near as I can tell from those around me going through it right now, it becomes even WORSE after 30.
This one is a well [researched] and [written about] phenomenon, particular to the way we live like in “The Time After Computers Were Supposed To Explode … But Didn’t.” The Internet – or more precisely the inventions that came with it (blogging, social networking, email, and – worst of all – instant messaging) – has managed to disconnect us all, by connecting us all.
The widespread use of SMS text messaging is also t blame. Sending someone a text message had become a substitute for real, substantive (sometimes not) verbal discourse. When whole relationships – indeed, many life changing decisions – are had completely via text, it’s a problem. People don’t even know how to talk to each other anymore.
...the media is a close secondI don’t think I need to go into this in depth, as most everyone knows how magazines, television and movies portray relationships. Now is when we begin to find out that no matter how hard we wish, Knights in Shining Armor don’t really exist. The Princess of the Tower left the building long ago. The life of a white picket fence, a dog, and 2.8 kids is gone. Period. Deal with it.
We simply don’t live that way anymore. Something like 55% of marriages are ending in divorce; Lord knows how many relationships have broken up on bad notes. How many times must people run into the brick wall of expectation? That’s the hard reality we face, heading into the 2nd trimester of life.
To be continued….
2 comments:
I agree to a certain extent. Yes, this generation has become too dependent on technology. However, I would not want to be alive at any other time.
Add thirty years to my life and I would have been asked to sit at the back of the bus, enter the back of the restaurants, and use a separate bathroom than my white counterparts.
Even just one generation prior, when my mother was born, I would have been one of the first students to attend a desegregated school (and all the "joy" and "togetherness" that came with that). And, let's not even talk about AIDS just coming on the scene.
This generation actually has a lot to be grateful for. In comparison to some other generations we've had it the easiest (as much as Bush may have tried to change that, it still holds true). Basically, our parents, elders and ancestors did a good job of making sure that their kids had it better than they did. We're those kids.
The problem today is not technology, it's abuse of technology. And, we all know that too much of anything isn't good. So, it really all comes down to everyone taking responsibility to make sure that they don't lose contact with friends after thirty (my mother is in her 40's and she's still friends with her high school friends). It's possible if people make the effort, and if they don't, that may speak to how strong the friendship was (or wasn't) in the first place.
((This is Genie, btw, but for some reason I had a problem choosing an identity.lol))
I have to agree with you definitely on the deteriorating friendships. I have recently become a victim of such. Long story cut short, we've been friends for 16 years. I have been there for good times and bad even down to the current relationship. I ended up being evicted from a wedding without notice or cause and then was told we just grew apart...lol. Eh, so such is life. It's not right but we gotta keep on truckin like Eddie Kendricks said.
As far as technology ruining communication amongst people, I will say it has changed a lot. I don't even speak on the phone that much anymore. I would rather text message people than actually talk, depending on who I am talking to. I just recently said to myself that I don't even speak to my friends from NY that much anymore and being in a foreign place, you would think I would reach out to them more for that familiar, comfortable feeling. It doesn't even phase me anymore. I know they are merely a text message or an IM away. Technology is a double edged sword. I agree with my fellow commenter about technology being abused but it's the way the government (big brother) intended. It is easier to keep tabs on everyone and see who is doing what, when, where and why. There is no longer a way to do things without a papertrail of some kind...even if it's a virtual paper trail.
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